Thursday, December 11, 2008

Shut up and Sing

That's what I was told. Except without the "and sing" part.

Okay, it started when I read this post on Gay Fresno the other day. It was called "Offensive Condescension". (side note: just figured out how to do a link!) The last line of it said "If you're going to stand up for equal rights, you better be willing to piss someone off."

I love that line. Love it, love it, love it.

Because I am getting SO sick of having to dance around the issue of someone else's bigotry and be SOOO careful not to call them what they are (a bigot).

Okay. From Wikepedia:

"A bigot is a person who is intolerant of opinions, lifestyles or identities differing from his or her own, and bigotry is the corresponding attitude or mindset. Bigot is often used as a pejorative term to describe a person who is obstinately devoted to prejudices, especially when these views are either challenged, or proven to be false or not universally applicable or acceptable.
The origin of the word bigot and bigoterie in English dates back to at least 1598, via Middle French, and started with the sense of "religious hypocrite", especially a woman."

Religious hypocrite. Don't ya just love it.

And from Merriam-Webster:

"Bigot: a person obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices ; especially : one who regards or treats the members of a group (as a racial or ethnic group) with hatred and intolerance"

Okay? Got it? Yet I am told again and again, that this is simply a "difference of opinion". That this is America and that we can "agree to disagree" here. That I am just "name-calling" when I call them a bigot.

So, not only do they need to look up the definition of a bigot, they need to understand the difference between "name-calling" and "naming".

But, I digress.

I read this article and mentioned it to my Republican husband. I said:

"You know what? I AM willing to stand up for civil rights and I AM willing to piss people off!"

All in all, I was pretty darn proud of myself. Usually, I am Miss Smoother-Over and I don't like to make too many waves. And I can back down when challenged. I have been improving, but sometimes having a mantra I can repeat in my head helps. ("Willing to piss people off"-my new mantra!)

Note: I can hear some of you saying that maybe pissing people off isn't the best way to go about convincing them of something. And I agree. That's why the line doesn't say "I am willing to stand up for civil right and I AM going to piss people off". See the difference? But, unless you want to pussyfoot around people for fear of offending them, you need to be willing.

Republican hubby says, "You are already pissing people off."

Okay, I could give you the long version of this conversation, but the short of it is:

I am pissing people off and they want me to shut up already about Prop 8. Who, I ask? Well, RH tells me, everybody. It's like pulling teeth to get it out of him and he names several family members, some of which I have not even talked to in months!

Okay, wrong on so many levels, but the one that pisses me off the most, is that he didn't stand up for me. He didn't say "She is fighting for civil rights that were taken away from a particular group in our society." He didn't say "Why don't you have the balls to tell her yourself?" He just passed along the message.

I only have one thing to say:

I am going to be even louder.

Edited to add: No, I have a second thing to say. Why, when this state (and three others) allowed discriminatory legislation to get on the ballot, when minority civil rights were put on the chopping block with their fates decided by a simple thumbs-up or down by the fickle public, are you pissed off at me?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

i liked this. you should post it.