Sunday, February 22, 2009

Maybe they're not getting any...

You know, for a country that prides itself on being the "best", this is a pretty hateful country. I don't even know how to deal with it sometimes. If you are a different color, ethnicity, religion, gender-identity, or sexual orientation, watch out! You are fair game. There will be laws against you. But, most of all (and the hardest to fight), public opinion will be against you. How do you fight that?

Now, obviously, some of these laws have been overturned. Like slavery, Jim Crow laws, the laws against discrimination based on race or gender. Oh, but not gender identity. Not sexual orientation. Legally? Still free game. I tell you, it makes me just want to sit here and scream obscenities.

I feel so helpless. I am one person. And, like I said, how do you fight public opinion? Especially, when the opinion is being formed by the one thing that is hardest to fight: religion. Oh yeah, don't fuck with people's religion. First off, there is not a chance in hell they will believe you. They get that whole "what my pastor says is true" thing going. And, even if you crack through their facade, just a little, they will turn cartwheels to make sure that you will never win the argument.
I just can't understand how they can keep defending this argument? How does a person keep up this level of hate and not self-destruct? How can they care so much about something that has nothing to do with them? I swear, this is giving me a headache in my eye.

The only answer I can come up with is sex. I think that if being gay had nothing to do with sex, then there wouldn't be all this fuss about it. Same with gender identity. If it had nothing to do with the "naughty parts", then would anyone really care?

Look at birth control. These same people seem hell-bent on making sure that kids don't have it. Now, while I don't want young kids having sex, I would rather they had protected, rather than unprotected, sex, no matter what. But, what about older teens and young adults? Really, why is waiting for marriage the only way to do it? Shouldn't we be teaching that they should be waiting for love? What is wrong with learning how to enjoy each other(safely), as long as there is mutual respect and caring?

I think there are people in this world who are miserable and won't be happy till we are all as miserable as them. Except, I still think they won't be happy. I blame religion, most specifically those that teach that sex is bad (except for procreation) and that women are sinful.

My RH is talking about religion again and he is wanting to be involved in it again. Now, I am getting a headache in my other eye.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Freedom to Marry Day


Yeah, I know I'm cheating by putting this two places, but I can't help it. Not everyone will see it there and not everyone will see it here and I liked what I wrote. So, here you go...


Ah, love, sweet love. And look! It’s Valentine’s Week! That week of hearts, roses and cheesy Valentines. This is the week to sneak that little candy heart to that special person that says “Will U B Mine?”

This is also the week to get married. How romantic would that be! The Fresno Mayor has just declared this Celebrate Marriage Week. How perfect! A week to celebrate that union of love and togetherness; that sacrament called marriage.

You know, I’m not sure how much more snark I can pull off without my head exploding. Because today four same-sex couples went before the Fresno County Clerk and asked for marriage licenses and they were denied. So, this week? Not so much with the celebration. No, it was more of a “we can’t believe you people are still trying to make us sit in the back of the bus didn’t we resolve the civil rights issue forty years ago” kind of party. Except without the party part.

Today was Freedom to Marry Day. There were about two dozen of us there. Some of us were there to support. We had gay supporters and straight supporters. Straight Advocates for Equality (SAFE) had a table full of information about how straight supporters of gay rights can help out their fellow human beings in their quest for equality. We had clergy from reconciling and welcoming churches there. We had Pastor Vickie Armour-Healy from Wesley United Methodist Church and Reverend Bryan Jessup from the Unitarian Universalist Church. Both were thrilled to be there to show their support of gay marriage and sported buttons saying “Straight, but not narrow”.

However, some of us were there today to get marriage licenses. Four couples in all went in, one at a time and requested a marriage license. Each couple was asked if this was a same-sex couple and each time was given the very rehearsed sounding speech of “In the state of California, blah, blah, blah”. Short version? “No, you can’t.”

Wait a minute! Isn’t this Celebrate Marriage Week? Isn’t this the week that “we come together this week to reaffirm marriage as the foundation of healthy families and a healthy future for America”? I’m not making this up, folks. It’s the first line of the proclamation that the mayor sent to the city council on Tuesday. So, the city of Fresno says that marriage is the foundation of a healthy family and future for America. Does this mean that they support equal marriage? Because if they don’t, then based on this, one might infer that they don’t think that everyone should have a healthy family and future. I am sure, however, that that is not what they mean and that the mayor and city council would never advocate inequality nor an unhealthy family or future. But, to be honest, I would love to hear it directly from one of them.

So, today we held up signs saying “All Men Are Created Equal” and “Liberty and Justice for All”. Some held their Marriage Equality signs up proudly and everyone walked tall today. I think that “pride” is more than code for “LGBT”. It’s what people have to be when others look down on them. It’s what you have to have when the world keeps slamming a door in your face. Today, we stood together; proudly giving voice to the stand that is equality. Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, straight, questioning, queer, clergy and even one of the media. This is not about whether or not gay marriage is right. We KNOW it’s right. This is about when are people going to do the right thing and support it.

Next, year, it’s going to be “yes, you can.” And I’m going to be there to see it. THEN we’ll have a party.